The Masked Reviewer
Some Members of the Cast
of Mystery Science Theater
and Interviews Them
Part III - Their Thoughts on New Movies
Here you will find some general information about Kevin Murphy (aka Tom Servo) and Mike Nelson (himself) from MST3K (Mystery Science Theater 3000). Be sure to read their predictions about a whole mess of films coming soon to theaters near you!
Some general information gleaned during a lecture given by Mike Nelson and Kevin Murphy.
Here is a test about comedy. Please answer whether the following ten items are funny or not funny.
(Answers: 1. Funny. 2. Not funny. 3. Funny. 4. Funny. 5. Not funny. 6. Not funny. 7. Funny. 8. Not funny. 9. Not funny.10. Funny.)
Kevin and Mike gave their fall movie predictions about some upcoming films. Hear are a few brief excerpts:
Payback (Ben Aflleck, directed by John Woo): Mike wonders whether Ben's face move at all? Never has, never will. He's Mt. Rushmore.
In the Cut (Meg Ryan): Mike says that even though it's a dark and creepy thriller, we can still expect to see her creeping around in feety pajamas like a fuzzy squirrel. Kevin thinks Meg Ryan is "a boiled potato in a wig."
Matrix Revolutions (Keanu Reeves): Mike's prediction: "What happens in this one is that Keanu emotes and the world explodes."
Alamo (directed by Ron Howard): Kevin - "This is the one that Ron Howard dumped." Mike - "He dumped, all right." They both seem to have trouble believing a whole movie can be set in a car rental company.
Looney Tunes (Bugs Bunny, Brendan Frasier): Mike believes that Brendan Frasier will really stretch himself, by not playing a Jay Ward cartoon character.
Cat in the Hat (Mike Meyers): Kevin just screams in agony.
Around the World in 80 Days: It's by Adam Sandler's production company, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and Rob Schneider. Mike and Kevin that it will "suck so tremendously, they might shut down the film industry."
Radio (Cuba Gooding, Jr.): Kevin points out that in this film, Cuba Gooding Jr. plays a 5-watt transistor radio. However, he also points out that if you hate it, you must hate all mentally ill people. Mike points out that Kevin hates all mentally ill people, to which Kevin retorted that Mike isn't supporting our troops.
Love, Actually (Hugh Grant): It's Hugh Grant in his natural habitat, with lots of blinking and stuttering. European clowning makes Mike feel ill...like someone "dragged something dead through the room."
Haunted Mansion (Eddie Murphy): Kevin thinks that this may be the first movie based on a ride based on a movie, which will spawn a new ride which will spawn a new movie based on that ride, possibly forming a naked singularity.
Bad Santa: Could this be the sequel to Bad Lieutenant in which we finally get to see Santa's little elf?
Timeline (written by Michael Crichton): Mike thinks that a bunch of archaeologists going back 600 years will be very much like going to a cut rate Ren Faire in Schaumburg, Illinois.
Something's Got to Give (Diane Keaton, Jack Nicholson): Kevin believes "Something's got to blow!" Diane Keaton does this kind of film so she can fund her coffee table books. This type of film will always do a steady amount at the box office. They're like low-risk mutual funds. Mike believes that Jack Nicholson won't be doing any scenes barefoot because then you'd be able to see his cloven hooves.
Mike points out that Tommy Lee Jones has an upcoming film in which he actually turns into a Sharpie.
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King: According to Kevin, Tolkein didn't know how to end a book. The story ends, and then there's an extra 300 pages at the end where they're moving and playing golf.
Stuck on You (Matt Damon and Greg Kinear): To fit both of their meaty faces on screen, it can only be shown in widescreen, so Mike says.
Kevin Murphy and Mike Nelson have both written amazingly funny books about movies. You can buy them and find out more here:
Mike Nelson's homepage: http://www.michaeljnelson.com/home/
Kevin Murphy's homepage: http://www.ayearatthemovies.com/
To buy the DVDs of "Mystery Science Theater 3000", try here:
Copyright 2003, Michael D. Lynn