Gigli is the latest from director
Martin Brest (tee-hee! Try not to titter at the name...) who you may
remember as the director of such films as Meet Joe Black and
Scent of a Woman, or maybe more favorably from Beverly Hills Cop
and Midnight Run. Fine films, those were.
The name of the film is the same name of the main character, which is
pronounced like "really", with a "j" at the beginning. It's not
"giggly" or "jiggly" or "guy-gleye". Unfortunately, figuring out
how to pronounce the film is the most interesting thing about it.
It's one of those strange films that sounds familiar, like it's a remake
of some mediocre 50's film, but it isn't, and -- with any luck -- no one
will ever try to make this film again.
The film stars J-Lo, and her recent fiancee, Ben Affleck, who will
probably start calling himself "B-Aff" now.
In keeping with his own policies, the Masked Reviewer won't give away
anything about the plot, because heaven knows that if you see this film,
you wouldn't want the big surprises to be ruined! And the Masked
Reviewer doesn't want to take the heat for ruining anyone's experience
at Gigli. The Masked Reviewer believes that there's an
audience for every film. Somewhere, someone thought A.I. was
a good film. There will be someone, somewhere, some day, that
really enjoys Gigli. But it's hard to imagine who.
That's not to say that this is the worst film ever. It's not
that bad, actually...you can sit through it. The stars are
both charismatic, though it's a bit of a stretch to see Ben Affleck as
the tough guy and Jennifer Lopez as the educated sophisticate.
They're fun to watch at times, and they do get a few laughs, but they're
few and far between. The pacing of the film is painfully slow,
especially for a romantic comedy with plot points that involve organized
Justin Bartha, in his first role, plays a retarded teenager. Maybe
he was brain damaged. It's hard to tell from his performance.
It's a bit like Dustin Hoffman in Rainman, only more of an
elementary school version. People who are offended by people
making fun of people with mental disabilities may find the film
offensive, as they make fun of the retard. And, it's not
There is another part of the film that might be offensive to gay
and/or lesbian viewers, that won't be described here. But, if
you're a sensitive gay man or lesbian woman, you might not groove on the
messages of the film. And if you're a queer retard, you should
just forget about it completely. Oh, lighten up! The Masked
Reviewer is just kidding. Some of his best friends are sexually
ambiguous and not quite all there mentally. The words "queer" and
"retard" were used for illustrative purposes only.
The bright spots of the film are one scene by Christopher Walken and
one scene by Al Pacino. They are each at their wacky, off-the-wall
best. Walken and Pacino almost make it worth sitting
through the rest of the film, if you like them. Lenny Venito also
turned out a good performance.
If you have a crush on J-Lo or B-Aff, you might see enough of them to
be happy. Affleck poses without his shirt a few times, and tries
to be cuddly, yet funny, yet tough, yet sensitive. J-Lo has at
least seven scenes that feature her signature ass (yes, the Masked
Reviewer counted) though she remains fully clothed. On the other
hand, she does give a 10 minute speech about her special womanly region
(ie her vagina) that was pretty nice.
Gigli is rigli sigli.
Expectation from the Title: A movie about a guy who can't stop
giggling every time he hears the name Martin Brest.
Mother's Rule (Always Say Something Good About Everything):
Ben and Jen make such a cute couple.
The Pros: Walken and Pacino are brilliant. J-Lo and B-Aff
are cute and charming.
The Cons: Slow pacing, not very interesting, Affleck and Lopez